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January 14th 2012 It is Saturday. Again. Funny that. A day which occurs every 7 days and yet I am surprised and relieved. My week, this particular week, has been full of adventure, peace, joy and the ever-unfolding process of … Continue reading
Today is the first day of the rest of my life. Corny, but true.
True too, it’s the first day of my first Psychotherapy Placement. As a 2nd year trainee transactional analysis psychotherapist, I must evidence my giving at least 750 hours of therapy, before I can qualify as an MSc Transactional Analysis Psychotherapist.
Sounds a lot doesn’t it? 750 hours. My tutors assure my learning group that these hours soon build up.
My placement is for 4 hours on a Saturday morning at a local Natural Health Practice - indefinitely if I want it/it works out. They provide Osteopathy, Acupuncture, lots really and of course Psychotherapy.
Sitting in this room, Room 7 to be precise, as I write the words ‘Saturday morning’, the ‘practising jew’ in me (could this be a new ego state I wonder…;-) ) which has been dormant for some time, emerges and I feel a distinct sense of guilt. Not for too long though. I acknowledge the feeling of guilt but still tell myself ‘I’m OK’ and ‘It’s OK’.
Actually I’m more than OK. Sabbath mornings in the synagogue were always a time spent internally mulling over the events of the week; mentally reflecting and preparing on the week ahead, as well as connecting emotionally to the prayers, music and congregation.
My time in this room, in the here and now, in this new space, is also like a sanctuary, a wonderful opportunity to do similar. Well, maybe without the music anyway.
Yes, I do see myself sitting in this room for perhaps several weeks, reading, studying, thinking and just being. Me, myself and I, but I also know, that in time clients will find their way to me and honour me by choosing to stay with me as their therapist. It is my earnest wish, that I can help them shift into a happier place, psychologically and emotionally.
On Sunday, this Bank Holiday weekend, I attended my first Institute of Transactional Analysis Regional Conference. As a trainee TA Psychotherapist I must evidence 500 hours of ‘other’ learning - as in CPD – and this is one way to learn, have fun, connect with like-minded individuals and of course, accrue some of those 500 hours.
The general theme of the conference was on The Human Shadow, the dark parts of our psyche, our unconscious, few of us want to actively connect with. Of the several and varied sessions on offer, I chose a creative writing session in the morning, which was worth the entire fee of the conference, and, not that I would, but if I’d chosen to go home after the lunch and not stayed for the afternoon sessions, I’d have found it totally worthwhile going, just for that session….oh ok and the lunch too!
Jane Nixon is a psychotherapist and along with her partner Neil Nixon, a published author, and lectur
er, conducted the session for the 6 of us (boy, did other people miss a treat – not sure how many attended the conference: maybe 100?). I felt privileged to be part of the small group and as a recently new blogger, was hungry to learn more.
We were introduced to the writing form of ‘Flash Fiction’, as a way of swiftly writing about a personal event. This writing can be used as a device to help clients come to terms with difficult topics either about themselves, their pasts or events in their lives they find challenging to speak of, or to draw into their consciousness. We were asked to think of one personal event of discomfort which happened to us recently and to make that the topic. No more writing than could cover 1 side of A4. We had 15 minutes. And this is what I wrote…..
A Shadowy Moment of Relief
It’s Saturday, and I’ve agreed, as the account holder of all our mobile phones (how did that happen?) to organise an upgrade with O2 for my husband Niall’s, mobile phone. I must also raise the repeated issue with them, of my 16yr old son, Sam’s mobile phone, not working as it should for the past 4 months.
I sit myself at the desk, mobile details neatly laid out on a piece of paper and placed to one side. In the back of my mind I’m thinking about the cello workshop I’m committed to attend in 3 weeks’ time and how I should be practising daily my part. I’m aware I keep putting it off. Why oh why do I frighten myself like this? I want to play well enough and not crumble at the green mist of fear when it comes to the recital. I resolve to do it later. Speaking to O2 is something only I can do. It’ll make the nagging go away.
I dial the number. I’m aware of voices in the hall – Niall and our 19yr old daughter, Tash - their conversation is too close to me. My ears are finding it a challenge to keep pace with the recorded voice in my left ear. The left ear that strains to keep track of the umpteen numbered options, delivered by a sicophantic sounding recorded voice. I’m straining even more to keep up with the listed options as the voices in the hall continue chatting.
And then, as though a demon leapt from m
y mouth I holler,
“Shuuuut Uuuuuup! I can’t hear!”
Apparently it was me shouting.
I apologised immediately, but you know what? It felt sooo good! Not only did the chatting stop, but I felt instantly better. I also managed to speak to O2 who organised the upgrade for my husband at no more than an extra £1.50 per month on top of what we were already paying. My son’s mobile issue was dealt with too and is going back for repair. Result!
I’m currently transcribing and analysing a live interview of my choice, as part of my studies to become a TA Psychotherapist. I’m in my first year, the Foundation Year and I’m loving it! There was plenty of material to choose from on the web and may I say at this point, thank goodness for YouTube!
The brief: to select an interview (not a drama), transcribe it and analyse it. It must be at least 5 minutes long. I chose the Charlie Sheen interview with ABC news reporter Andrea Canning. Never mind the content frequently having me gather my jaw up from the floor, no matter how many times I replay the recording. I found that my listening skills, which I always thought were pretty good – (still do actually, but there’s always room for improvement, right?) have been found wanting, when it’s come to transcribing accurately what each person within the interview session is ACTUALLY saying.
It’s as though, the more I replay back what I think I heard, I find I’ve missed words, the odd pause here and there, repetitions or extra words. I’ve even found I’ve reported hearing words that actually weren’t said…spooky! I understand I can see someone about that…?
Sure there is much in the way of converstational analytics – the places in speech, where you hear the likes of ‘erm….you know…. just…. well’ ..you get the idea – but it seems under normal day-to-day filtering, I have the ability to filter those out and just sum up in my head the general message, or sometimes even the wrong one.
So here’s the thing, by listening to those conversational analytics, I’m finding there is greater meaning to the transactions within the interview, that the content becomes much richer in what I’m receiving by transcribing what’s said, than if I just watched and listened.
This learning that I’ve embarked on is unfolding my awareness and attention constantly – just doing this essay, this transcription and analysis, is turning up the volume on my listening skills and I think the world will always sound louder to me now…there’s no going back!
Thanks for reading and I invite all your comments.
Mandy Randall-Gavin
Last Tuesday May 3rd, Craig Taylor hosted a podcast on first-time bloggers and those that volunteered and could make it, were Niall Gavin, Kate Graham and myself. Craig’s laptop has since passed to the great ‘laptop in the sky graveyard’ and whilst it’s possible the podcast may be recoverable, I thought I’d post my responses to the questions Craig posed to us all.
What has been your experience with blogs? The first blog I remember reading and connecting to, was that of Clive Shepherd, elearning guru. It felt like he was chatting to an imaginary group of ‘us’ but kept the topic to the point and used language that was totally accessible. His blogs are just the right length too – ie not too long. I’d point anyone starting to blog, to read Clive Shepherd’s blogs – you can learn a lot from him.
I’ve read more since I’ve been connected on Twitter for the last 10 months and that’s only when someone I’m following, whose thought processes and statements I have respect and empathy for, have ‘spoken’ to me in some way.
Prior to that I’d find myself stumbling across blogs by chance, en route to getting information (usually via Google searches). I have to say many blogs come over as preachy, wordy or say “look at me!”, can be way too long and it has to be said, not as well crafted as they could be – Now I recognise I’m going to sound like a grumpy old women when I say this, but any more than a couple of spelling and grammatical errors and I’ve switched off, no matter how many words of wisdom there may be contained within.
I read more blogs these days, but am particular about whose I read.
What was the motivation behind you starting your recent blog? Three things really.
Firstly I’ve always wanted to blog but wasn’t confident that what I had to say was ‘worthy enough of putting out there’. This is due to my very strong driver of ‘Be Perfect’ and injunction of ‘Don’t Shine’. I’m pleased to tell you that age and experience have taught me that ‘just enough is plenty’ that being perfect is relative and that you can ‘please some of the people some of the time’, but you ‘can’t please all of the people, all of the time’ and that is good enough.
Secondly, I was invited to deliver a webinar in March of this year on ‘How to use your voice brilliantly in online sessions’ and felt that what I had to share re vocal training and experience of IT Training online shouldn’t stop there and that blogging would be the perfect vehicle for me to keep sharing what I’d learnt and provide tips and help for others looking for support in this area.
Thirdly, I was made redundant last year and have had a struggle finding paid work although I’ve got close a couple of times. Although I’d keep telling myself ‘you are not defined by a job title’, I wasn’t getting the validation I’d got used to receiving in my day-to-day work. It could have been so easy for me to sink in to a deep dark hiding place for so much of my time out of work, and whilst I did sink on occasions, it wasn’t somewhere I liked to be and so blogging keeps ‘Brand Mandy’ out there and helps my self-esteem energy levels.
Some of you ‘ummed and aaahed’ about it prior to starting. What were the reasons behind that? Once I’d made the decision that I should start blogging, I then found I fell at the first post because I was dealing with a technical blogging landscape I wasn’t familiar with. For example I didn’t realise that there was more to enabling the start of a blog than getting an account on WordPress. After some research and help from followers on Twitter, I realised I needed to buy the services of a Domain Host. I’ve since discovered I didn’t need to do that, could have saved myself £40, but there are lots of benefits for setting it up the way I have, so there are no regrets.
Then there was the wondering of whether I should have a US company host my domain name or a UK one. With the help of my friend, fellow L&D professional, and internet savvy Geoff Penn, it took no time at all to get set up. I just needed some initial training, which Geoff was generous to provide and I was on my way.
What made you opt for your particular blogging platform? Word of mouth. I had had WordPress recommended by many. Tumblr was another one recommended, but in the end went with WordPress. I’d love to find out if it records hits to the blog. If it does, then I’ve been looking in the wrong place….anybody? Kate Graham was helpful in suggesting I look into embedding Google Analytics…will have a look, thanks Kate!
Does your org blog? In my case that question should be did your org blog? Well interestingly enough when the new ‘Technology Training Manager Firmwide’ started with the Firm 2 years before I left, he was keen to get a wiki set up in SharePoint for the Technology training team to interract and he acheived this. In one year I was the only person to blog on it. Once. I had a couple of acknowledgements from the global team of 12 IT Training Professionals but apart from that, no-one else blogged. It became a desert and I stopped visiting it in the hope someone else may have posted (and yes, I had set up RSS feeds to notify me of those posting and commenting, but I just couldn’t believe that nothing was happening).
As Craig pointed out during the interview, it’s not necessarily the case that ‘if you build it, they will come’.
I think the story here, is that if the culture of the organisation is such that to ‘share’ is a cautious exercise a bit like walking on egg shells, then folk won’t be encouraged to blog for love nor money. There has to be a working environment of trust and non-judgement, which in an economically stringent time where redundancies have happened on a number of occasions, no-one will stick their neck out…just in case.
What benefit can you see blogging being to your learners? Both in terms of creation and consumption Regarding creation, I think each of us in Learning & Development has a voice and a growing pot of experience in their related field, which colleagues and fellow networked professionals can learn from. It’s about ‘walking the talk’ and giving something back to the Learning & Development community as well as ‘showing up’. Metaphorically speaking, hasn’t blogging replaced graffiti? I never did that by the way….I was a good girl, damnit! Although thinking about it, I did embellish the carvings others had done before me on the wooden desk top..does that count?
With regards to consumption, I’d want to create lists allied to the training courses being delivered by either myself or colleagues as extra support for all the learners and trainers. The list could be seen as a metaphorical crutch, there to provide additional support during and after the training.
I also think reading a blog can enhance your continuing professional development when the topic has context and doesn’t go on for pages.
What advice would you give to others considering starting a blog? Do it, but consider the following as a framework to work within.
As Human Beings, our need to connect with others is strong and key to our healthy development. Connection endorses and validates your identity, it tells others you’re still here and that you’re willing to speak up and share. In this competitive job market whether you’re in or out of a job, I think that’s important, to be seen to be actively doing that.
Hopefully if the podcast isn’t recoverable we will be recording it again, but anyway I’d be interested to know your thoughts and blogging experience of getting started. How was it for you? Any of this resonate with you?
The sun is shining today in Brighton, a beautiful May day. I’m sitting at my laptop and from the back doors onto our decking, I can see our magnificent apple tree standing green and strong and full of character.
The dining room table in front of me is a busy, yet organised, mess of beading boxes, tools and finished hand-made jewelery and if I say so myself, it all looks rather lovely. I made it all myself; me, with my own hands. Well done me.
Today I wait for the call. Actually for the last 7 months I’ve waited for the call. The call which will say, “They want you, you’ve got the job!”
I was made redundant last June after almost 5 years working for a US Law Firm in the City of London. The time since then has brought a good deal of pain and so much gold: gold in my self-development and process; gold in the first year of learning which I’ve undertaken as a trainee of Transactional Analysis Psychotherapy; gold in my relationships with friends, partner and offspring.
Having the space to think, reflect and work in a different way from the daily commute and the 9-5 has been a gift. I really, really mean that.
I am a Learning & Development Professional who believes she still has much to offer, as well as learn, in the paid, working world of IT Training, and am still trying to secure paid work. I’m finding it a struggle. I know it’s a tough economic climate ‘out there’, and I’ve adjusted my expectations accordingly and lowered my sights. In spite of that, nothing has emerged as a successful outcome: ie getting a job.
I’ve come close. I’m interviewed, receive positive feedback, knock other candidates out and then don’t get the job. Am I really to believe that as a woman, in her 50s ageism is rife and operating in today’s market?
I’ve delivered a webinar for the Learning & Skills Group, which was well-received. The topic was a big draw, 224 people attended and I’ve been invited to deliver the same topic for The Institute of IT Training in July. I blog, I tweet with other Learning & Development professionals, and I look for jobs online everyday.
I have visited, as a short-term resident, that deep, dark abyss that is depression and it’s a lonely, painful place to be. It’s debilitating, enervating and my wish is never to visit it again.
By immersing myself in jewelery-making, I’m stroking my creativity and the fact that girlfriends want to buy it, tells me it’s alright, beautiful even. So validation there, which I truly value.
I realise that working as an IT Training Professional over the past 20 years, I’ve gained my validation from the people I’ve worked with, the learners who’ve attended my training and even the day-to-day folk within the business who, whilst I didn’t work directly with them, saw me every day and acknowledged me.
When you’re out of work, all that goes away. In work, you’re seen, you have status, you can feed and clothe your family; then suddenly, you’re invisible.
Another way of describing how this feels, is to ask you, dear reader, to imagine being on your idyllic holiday by the sea. At last, this is the break you’ve been craving for, for so long! You’re swimming; you’re loving the warmth of the sun on your face; the blue, blue sky above and all the sounds from the birds singing; as well as holiday activity coming from the beach. Suddenly you lose your footing and go under the water. Gone is all sound, gone the visible map of where you are, suddenly you’re plunged into a strange, dark, landscape, which without air, is impossible to survive. Being unemployed feels a little like that.
I realise it sounds dramatic and, of course, as an unemployed woman, I can assure you I can breathe and I can see and I can hear…otherwise I wouldn’t be writing this. But the energy it takes to remain positive (and afloat) when you’re unemployed is huge, and not to be underestimated.
So, I’ve just spoken to the recruitment agent who tells me I’m still in the running for the job I’ve been waiting to hear about, but we won’t know before next week, as there is yet another candidate to be seen.
Hope springs eternal…as they say…
How does this resonate for any of you?
So you’re booked to deliver a webinar, online meeting or virtual classroom session. Good! You know that the information you’ll cover, will benefit the learners as well as the organisation. You’re even passionate about the subject. Much time and effort has been invested by you to make sure your design of the slides is well crafted and enhances your message. You’ve even taken tips from Neil Lasher’s webinar (I know I did…thanks Neil) delivered some months earlier for the Learning And Skills Group. You’re sure of your topic and confident to answer questions and field any tricky ones. It’s all looking good.
So what are our expectations as L&D professionals, of our learners/audience sticking like glue to every word we have to impart?
The reality is, that Trainers, and anyone delivering information to a group on line, need to remember that changes to events, communication and environment is constant, it’s taking place all the time, that the present is immediately the past – that all these things are happening synchronously, all the time, wherever we are. By that, I mean that we as L&D professionals must expect that the attention of the attendee may never wholly be on listening to us, looking at each slide, digesting the concepts and information being delivered, no matter how fantastic our session may be.
The truth as I see it, is that the virtual environment facilitates multi-tasking of attendees, even if it means the learner picking up a pen during the session, making notes, adding to their supermarket shopping list, or Tweeting. True, face-to-face there’d be less liklihood of an attendee doing any or all of that, if the subject is engaging, the trainer is a good enough communicator, plus there’s a degree of ‘what’s in it for them?’ from the session. There’s an understood etiquette face-to-face that doing any of the above, could be considered a little rude. In the virtual world however, the attendee is to a great degree, hidden and should feel, if their attention is wandering, that they are free to do whatever they want. Not something any of us should feel any guilt about. No-one is policing them, and we as L&D professionals should encourage them not to police themselves. We are all adults after all. Our attendees can choose how much of their attention during attendance of an online session they give. They’ll get something from it and in my book, that’s good enough. Perhaps if they knew they needed to sit a paper exam at the end of the session, their attention would be more focussed.
So what I’m saying is that trainers and infact anyone having to communicate online should be realistic in setting expectations of how attentive or otherwise the attendees may be.
When I attend a webinar delivered by anyone, or virtual learning or meeting session, I always make sure there is a notebook to hand, to Google anything that takes my interest. Maybe I’ve spotted something I’m not sure of displayed on a slide: this could be terminology, or perhaps an accronym and I’ve missed the speaker explaining what that is (if they’ve actually done that) and can look it up straight away or leave it as a note to be dealt with later.
When I attend any online session I actively engage in the Chat Window. This facility, is an exciting way to connect virtually with other L&D professionals attending: to share thoughts, learning and banter. In fact I’d go so far as to say, that the Chat Window provides vital energy for the session – at least it does for me. Anyone else agree? It’s live, it’s moving and you need to keep your eye on it, no matter what speed it’s moving at. The Speakers voice, by correct pitch and inflection, should clearly signal when a new topic is being introduced or a question is being asked, to snap me back to entering my response. Another reason to make sure we Trainers/Speakers are using our voices brilliantly!
We know as professionals that even in a face-to-face session, no one meeting member/learner will take absolutely everything away from the session. I believe that Training is a drip drip effect and we, as the squeezers of that dropper (I know it’s a bit cheesy, but I’m choosing to keep it in) must keep gently dropping the learning, in the hope that something will soak in and aid demonstrable changes of behaviour to our learners/team members in their day-to-day work activities.
Thank you for reading and I welcome all your comments.
Mandy
After months of working at putting together a 38 slide presentation and researching my topic, I finally delivered ‘How to use your voice brilliantly in online sessions’ for the Learning And Skills Group last Thursday 31st March. Don Taylor was a huge factor in helping me craft the order and content, so as to have the greatest impact of delivering this topic via the many and varied drafts.
Not being a ‘big cheese’ I thought that maybe 20 people might attend (if I was lucky). Few have heard of me, although I’ve been in the IT Training profession for some 24 years. Clearly the topic was a big draw as 224 people turned up! Many friends and former colleagues who I had invited personally, couldn’t get on, or if they could, they didn’t get sound, but this might also be down to any number of factors, their knowledge and experience of webinars, being one of them. I think it’s still such a new medium for so many people and there’s still a lot of work to be done to encourage them to hook in to it. Even more important for us trainers, is to make their experience of attending online, an experience where they really feel they’ve connected and learnt something and yes, been ‘seen’! What is it, ‘they’ say? You get about 7 seconds to make a decision on whether or not you like a person/environment/experience. Trainers, I urge you to start listening to yourselves, via a recording, as others hear you.
But what about those Trainers who have been tasked, either by their respective organisations, or by themselves to build a suite of online learning? Where is there written a clear path regarding what needs to be done and how? It seems to me that so much of the end result is reached through a disjointed voyage of discovery, rather than by any clear-ordered process. There needs to be more guidance. Not spread over 300 places, virtual or otherwise. It shouldn’t have to be so hard.
So much ‘gold’ came out of the chat people entered, and with 224 attendees, that Chat Window was certainly scrolling at a fast pace! I’m in the process of analysing the results. Lots of material in there to write about and hopefully provide further guidance.
I thought it might be fun to create a Wordle of all the favourite voices shared by the attendees and you can examine it here via this link
I thoroughly enjoyed the whole experience, from gathering the research, to crafting the slides and writing my script, and then to deliver the topic – one close to my heart! I felt so energised by the experience, but then not unsurprisingly, 1 hour later, I was completely exhausted! Trainers, DO NOT underestimate the energy it takes to deliver online. Delivering when I did, at 12-1 was perfect, because lunchtime enabled me to chill.
I can not reiterate enough how important it is, that voice quality is closely looked at, in ensuring the success of any virtual meeting or session. I’m not convinced that trainers and L&D professionals have fully embraced the importance of the quality of their voices and the impact their voices have on their sessions. One attendee commented in the chat window that they hadn’t thought of the voice ’in that way’ for online sessions…
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So what seems obvious to me, has yet to be considered by others. If this webinar succeeds in encouraging Trainers and Speakers to consider their vocal quality, and to work on improving it as a vital tool, then I believe I’ve served my fellow professionals well. Learning is all about opening up our awareness and I think this webinar will enable us as Learning Professionals, to hook into getting the ‘vocal’ message out there.
I’ve been delivering online, during the past 5 years, although not that often. There are so many factors to be considered in delivering online: technology, software, timing, topic, slide presentation, questions and interactivity, even venue. Even once all that is in place, is there someone to help you during your session, ie a Host? The thought of not having Don to steer the chat and gather the questions entered, would have made it a whole different experience for both myself and the attendees. Certainly less rich and engaging. Also no way would it have flowed as it did. I may have been the driver, but my host was the fuel that got us where we needed to be.
Once an online session has been delivered, ask yourself if there’s more you can do to facilitate the learning coming out of the session? Attendees should be encouraged to hit Twitter or Yammer and similar social networks - make a group so the Trainer and Learners can share real experiences of application of the topic in the workplace with each other.
Lessons I learned? Rehearse even more than I did, speaking out loud from script, so that I can fly off script (not off topic) more and more. I’m hoping too, that comes with confidence, the more I get to deliver. Thanks for reading this. This is my first blog – hope you found it a worthwhile read and I’d love to hear what you think.